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Thursday, January 1, 2015

Jebalicious (Splintered Trilogy Spoof of Fergalicious)

Four, tres, two, uno

[Morpheus]
Listen up y’all, 'cause this is it
The beat that I'm bangin' is delicious

[Verse 1 - Jenara]
Jebalicious definition make them girls go loco
They wanna kiss him so they get their pleasures from his photo.
You can see him, you can read about him.
He ain't easy, He ain't sleazy.
He’s got no reasons why he tease 'em.
Girls just come and go like seasons.

[Hook 1 - Jeb]
Jebalicious (Jen & Alyssa: so delicious)
But I ain't Morpheus.
And if you were suspicious,
All that shit is fictitious.
I give Alyssa kisses (mmmwwahhh)
That puts them girls on rock, rock.
And Taelor be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno)

[Chorus – Jen & Alyssa]
So delicious (it's hot, hot)
So delicious (He put them girls on rock, rock)
So delicious (they wanna slice of what he’s got)
He’s Jebalicious (t-t-t-t-t-tasty, tasty)

[Verse 2 - Jeb]
Jebalicious def-, Jebalicious def-,
Jebalicious def-
Jebalicious definition make them girls go crazy.
They always claim they own me,
Comin' to me call me baby ( Alyssa: Hey, baby),
I'm the J to the E, B, E, the D, I, A, H
And can't no other skater be as fly as me.

[Hook 2 - Jeb]
I'm Jebalicious (Jen & Alyssa: so delicious)
My body’s stayin’ vicious
I be up in Underland just working on my fitness
She's my witness (oh, wee)
I put yo' girl on rock, rock
And Taelor be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno)

[Chorus – Jen & Alyssa]
So delicious (it's hot, hot)
So delicious (He put them girls on rock, rock)
So delicious (they wanna slice of what he’s got)
He’s Jebalicious (hold, hold, hold, hold, hold up, check it out)

[Jeb to Alyssa]
Baby, baby, baby,
If you really want me,
Honey tell me how you feel.
Maybe then you'll get a taste.
I'll be tasty, tasty,
You’ll be laced with lacey.
It's so tasty, tasty,
It'll make you crazy.

[Morpheus]
T to the A, to the S T E Y - Boy, you're tasty, T to the A to the S T E Y - boy, you're tasty
D to the E, to the L I C I O U S, to the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the, hit it Allie!

[Rap - Alyssa]
All the time he turns around Taelor gathers round always looking at him up and down looking at his (uh)
I just wanna say it now - I ain't trying to round up drama, little mama you don’t get to have my man.
And I know I'm coming off just a little bit jealous and I keep on repeating how the girls wanna be with him.
But I'm tryin' to tell, that he can't be treated like clientele
'Cause they say he...

[Hook 3 -Jeb]
Delicious (so delicious)
But I ain't Morpheus
And if you were suspicious
All that shit is fictitious
I give Alyssa kisses (mmmwwahhh)
That puts them girls on rock, rock
And Taelor be lining down the block just to watch what I got (got, got, got)

Four, tres, two, uno.
My body’s stayin’ vicious,
I be up in Underland just working on my fitness,
She's my witness (oh, wee).
I put yo' girl on rock, rock,
And Taelor be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno)

[Chorus – Jen & Alyssa]
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
He’s Jebalicious, t-t-t-t-t tasty, tasty
It's so delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
He’s Jebalicious, t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t (aye, aye, aye, aye)

[Morpheus]
T to the A, to the S T E Y - boy, you're tasty. T to the A, to the S T E Y - boy, you're tasty
T to the A, to the S T E Y - boy, you're tasty. T to the A, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)
D to the E, to the L I C I O U S, to the D, to the, E to the, L I C I O U S, to the
D to the E, to the L I C I O U S, to the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)


Morphues: What am I saying!? Hey Alyssa!

[Morpheus to Alyssa]
T to the A, to the S T E Y - girl, you're tasty. T to the A, to the S T E Y - girl, you're tasty
T to the A, to the S T E Y - girl, you're tasty. T to the A, to the, four, tres, two, uno
D to the E, to the L I C I O U S, to the D, to the E, to the L I C I O U S, to the
D to the E, to the L I C I O U S, to the D, to the E, to the, to the, to the, to the, to the..... *Jeb Punches Morpheus*



Tuesday, December 30, 2014

I Miss You (Splintered Trilogy: Jelyssa) Original Song

I Miss You
I miss hearing your voice and looking into those bright green eyes.
I miss all of the simple joys I experience with you in my life.
I can’t wait to be back in your arms and cuddle up next to you, so tight.
With you, I’ll stay nice & warm and everything will feel so right.
I miss the taste of your sweet kisses; thinking about it makes me want to shed a tear.
Without you, I’ve forgotten what pure bliss is and I keep wishing you were here.
I miss having your arms wrapped around me; with you is my favorite place to be.
I wanna hear your jokes, your laugh and every word you say. You’re my sunshine on a rainy day.
I miss all of your playful teasing. I wanna see you again so desperately.
Just one thing I wanna let you know, I don’t ever wanna let you go.
I will always stay by your side. You’re the one that I need.
Thoughts of you keep running through my mind. I miss you with all of my heart, baby.




Friday, December 5, 2014

OUAT Song Sppof (Gangsta Crocodile: The Hip-Hop Ballad of Rumplestiltskin)




That crocodile don't, that crocodile don't, that crocodile don't want none unless you've got a hook son.

Boy toy named Hook used to live in Mist Haven. Big ladies man hottie, he was gettin’ some action. Was runnin from the law, but he lives on a ship. He stole my wife, Milah. He was gettin’ me pissed.

Now that’s real real real. His heart in my bag, bitch I came here to kill. He’s gonna be first. I’ll have him pushin’ up daisies. I’m twisted as hell, of course,  I’m so crazy. I’m on a vendetta.

By the way, what he say? He can tell I ain’t missin’ no deals. Come through & kill him in my automobile. Give him so damn much pain to feel. He keep tellin’ me to chill. He keep tellin’ me it’s real, I have no more time to kill. Because I don’t like him alive, in pain he will writhe. So I pulled up in the Caddie, & with my cane I hit him with a jab like…dun-d-d-dun-dun-d-d-dun-dun

That crocodile don’t, that crocodile don’t. that crocodile don’t want none unless you’ve got a hook son.

Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Look at his hook.

This man-child named Pan used to fly in Neverland. Ego bigger than a ogre, I ain’t talkin’ bout shrek. Real punk ass creeper, made me emotionally wrecked. Squid ink put his ass to sleep, now he callin’ me Rumple. Now that Pan, Pan, Pan. I sacrificed myself to kill, kill him. And now I’m back, and I wanna crush a pirate. I’m on a vendetta.

By the way, what he say? He can tell I ain’t missin’ no deals. Come through & kill him in my automobile. Give him so damn much pain to feel. He keep tellin’ me to chill. He keep tellin’ me it’s real, I have no more time to kill. Because I don’t like him alive, in pain he will writhe. So I pulled up in the Caddie, & with my cane I hit him with a jab like…dun-d-d-dun-dun-d-d-dun-dun

That crocodile don’t, that crocodile don’t. that crocodile don’t want none unless you’ve got a hook son.

Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Look at his hook.

Got a little sex appeal, but he got much hook.
Got a little sex appeal, but he got much hook.
Got a little sex appeal but he got much hook.
Oh my gosh (look at his hook)

That crocodile don’t, that crocodile don’t. that crocodile don’t want none unless you’ve got a hook son.

(don’t don’t don’t) that crocodile don’t
(don’t’ don’t don’t) don’t want none unless you’ve got a hook son.
Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Oh my gosh, look at his hook. Look at his hook.

Yeah, he hate this dark one. Yeah! This one is for my bitches with a dark side in fucking Storybrooke. I said, “where my dark sided bitches in Storybrooke?” Fuck those hero bitches, fuck those hero bitches in Storybrooke. I wanna see all the dark sided bitches in motherfucking Storybrooke. Fuck you if you hero bitches. What? Yeah! Yeah. I’m the dark one! Bring it!






Wednesday, October 8, 2014

Once Upon A Time Parody of Taylor Swift's Shake It Off

So, I changed most of the words to make it sound like Regina's point of view lol. Below the lyrics is the music video I made of the original TSwift song featuring the one & only Captain Hook with the hella good hair. (only his picture. not really him).

"Cast A Spell Lyrics"

I won't leave it up to fate
Got an idea in my brain
to find the author of the book mhmm
to find the author of the book mhmm

I just lost my date
cause I couldn’t make him stay
 he’s going his own way mhmm
going his own way mhmm

But I keep pacing
Can't stop, won't stop thinking
It’s like there’s no happy ending
for my kind
So maybe this really is goodbye

'Cause the children gonna play, play, play, play, play
And Marian’s gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
Baby, I'm just gonna cast, cast, cast, cast, cast
I cast a spell, I cast a spell
Robin’s gonna have my heart break, break, break, break
And Emma keeps pushing Killian away
Baby, I'm just gonna take, take, take, take, take
back what is mine, what is mine.

I sit here in defeat
listening to my heart beat
And I just wanna rip it out mhmm
I just wanna rip it out mhmm

I won’t answer my phone 
cause I need to get in the zone 
And that's what they don't know, mhmm
that's what they don't know, mhmm

But I keep pacing
Can't stop, won't stop thinking
It’s like there’s no happy ending
for my kind
So now I’m gonna put up a fight

'Cause the children gonna play, play, play, play, play
And Marian’s gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
Baby, I just gotta recuperate 
from this heartbreak, from this heartbreak
Robin’s making my heart ache, ache, ache, ache
And Emma’s gonna fall into a lovestruck state
Baby, I just gotta reevaluate my fate
So I cast a spell, I cast a spell

Cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell

Hey, hey, hey
Just think while you've been getting down and out about the liars and the dirty, dirty cheats of the world,
You could've been getting down to this sick beat.

My ex-man brought his living dead wife
She's like "Oh, my god!" but I just want her head on a spike!
And to the Dark One over there with the hella good hair
Won't you come on over, Gold? We can Cast. A. Spell.

Yeah ohhh

'Cause the children gonna play, play, play, play, play
And Marian’s gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate
I'm just gonna take, take, take, take, take
back what is mine, what is mine
Not gonna allow my heart to break, break, break 
Emma needs to be with Killian for goodness sakes 
Baby, I'm just gonna take, take, take, take, take
back what is mine, what is mines 

So I Cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell

Cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell

Cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell,
I, I, I cast a spell, I cast a spell

Friday, October 25, 2013

Dear Mr. Fitz...

Dear Mr. Fitz, what made you so angry at life that you have to go after these 5 girls? Are teenage girls your weakness, like kryptonite is to superman? I hope you know that you didn't just break Aria's heart...you've broken the entire fan base's hearts. I am so disappointed in you. -Shelbs


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Mr. Fitz, do you even have an actual master's degree? What makes you so qualified to be a high school english teacher? You're trying to kill a few specific students. What are you gonna do when they find out you're A?? Text them their grades as A? How did you not have a criminal record before this? Were you not required to have a background check? I don't remember schools allowing psychopathic stalkers to become teachers. Just sayin'. -Shelbs


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Mr. Fitz, I sit here curled up in my bed and lost in my thoughts. So, therefore, I must ask...what is your motive to be terrorizing these girls? What did they do to you??? I mean, sure, Alison might have done something a little cruel, but why punish her friends (especially Aria) for her wrong doings? Even if she did do something cruel, you're even worse than her. If you ask me, all signs just point to pedophilia. I have no other logical answer for your motive other than that. You, my dear Ezra, are a pedophile. -Shelbs


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Mr. Fitz, how are you? I'm sure you're feeling sinister today. Something just came to my mind. Do you have genuine feelings for Aria, or have you been playing her like guitar strings? It is a curious thing. You did warn her to be careful in Ravenswood. So I have a couple of theories:
1.) You genuinely fell in love with Aria before you realized she was one of Alison's friends, but still couldn't bear to hurt her. So you didn't terrorize Aria as much.
2.) You've been playing her since the day ya'll met at the bar and the reason you haven't completely torn her to pieces like the others, is because you have something in mind for the near future.
3.) You could just be a darn sociopath.
-Shelbs


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Mr. Fitz, I re-watched the halloween episode and I must say, you fight worse than a girl. It actually seemed like you were too scared to even lay a hand on Spencer. Tsk Tsk. If you're gonna be the leader of a psychotic group of people, you need to at least learn how to fight. You're too much of a pansy. You didn't knock Spencer out yourself. She just happened to be taken by surprise when you grabbed her and she hit her head...you did not push her. I know this because you pushed her at the beginning and it was so weak. Some villain you are. The picture below might explain why you're such a pansy hehe. And no Spencer, he did not find his nuts. -Shelbs

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Mr. Fitz, as you can tell, I simply cannot take you seriously even though you're A. I think that out of all the reveAls, yours is the funniest. It is also the most heart-breaking, but still hilarious. Do you even know what you're doing? And besides, if A is so great at finding out information, how did you not know Malcolm wasn't your son beforehand? No wonder you need more than just yourself doing the dirty work, because you're terrible at it. You should know by now that I can't take you seriously just because this entire blog post is making fun of you in every single way. Duh. -Shelbs

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Mr. Fitz, I must say you're too obvious for your own good. You never had that legitimate explanation as to why you had $50,000 in your sock drawer instead of a freakin' bank. Aria should have known you didn't get that much money for a car, especially when Jason was offering $50,000 for information on Alison's body. And let's not forget your taste of older music. At the end of almost every episode, there's usually an oldies song playing. Oh and don't forget that when Noel confronted you, you looked very guilty after he wrote the letter A in a red pen. Oh and let's not forget that the girls should have realized that Ali ran off right before you came around the corner in the halloween episode. Suspicious much? Spencer should have noticed that you kept your right hand in your pocket the entire time too. You've looked quite guilty in a lot of situations actually. These are things that make you go hmmm. -Shelbs

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dear Mr. Fitz, in conclusion, you should just give up now. They're gonna find out it's you in the next half of the season, I'm sure. So you might as well surrender. Not only will Aria kick your butt after she goes through a mental breakdown, but so will the fanbase. Muahahaha! Did you really think no one else was after you? You have poor judgement, Ezra. You'll never get yourself out of this mess. Time is ticking, Mr. Fitz and you oughta watch your back. Kisses, -Shelbs. 

Instead of Mona, it will be you!



Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Pretty Little Liars Halloween Episode and Ravenswood Premiere

Alright, guys. If I could describe the PLL Halloween episode in one three words, it would be...what. the. hell. So much crazy stuff happened, I don't even know where to begin. So Ali is alive for real..it's not just a rumor anymore. I'm still torn about EzrA. I personally believe the entire town of Ravenswood is completely haunted though. That town needs to be exorcised. It's so hard to accept all of this craziness. I jumped and screamed a few times; it would have been less had my boyfriend not been trying to scare me every 10 minutes. I just have one question Ezra. . .why are you so angry at life? When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, not become a psychopathic stalker. Below is a picture of how I feel about Mr. Fitz. 




As for the Ravenswood premiere, it was so great. It has a completely different feel to it. It's such a paranormal aspect, that I got so freakin' scared watching it. I felt as if I was child afraid of monsters under the bed, except much worse. I do believe that Mrs. Grunwald lady or however you spell it is up to something. I still do not completely trust her. I will say it's a really messed up plot. Can't wait for next week though!


Pretty Little Liars Winter Promo January 7th, 2014







xoxo, Shelbs <3


Monday, September 30, 2013

Warning! Spoilers! Once Upon A Time Season 3 Premiere!

     Ahhh! This! This was the moment I've been waiting for; the moment all oncers have been waiting for. First I must say the premiere was amazing! Such an exciting kick off to yet another awesome season. Just so ya'll know, I ship Rumbelle (Rumpel and Belle), SwanFire (Emma and Baelfire), and of course Snowing (Snow White and Prince Charming). So I'm going to take this scene by scene and offer up my thoughts on this premiere. Enjoy!


Alright, so first off, what a wicked storm that was. Mermaids are nasty little creatures, and as Regina said, "Filet the bitch!" That was some crazy girl fight that broke out. Then, to have Hook and Charming fight. Oh and when Emma jumped off the ship, then proceeded to get knocked out by something that fell off the ship...wow. I was freaking. out. Baelfire is totally rocking the magic thing. I'm so relieved that he's alive. He is Emma's true love fo sho. Rumpelstiltskin is effing amazing! With him, everything is possible. These six legends are gonna kick some Neverland ass. Kudos, to ole Rumpel for volunteering to help rescue Henry. Old Peter Pan pulled a fast one on us. How dare he take Henry. The real question is, why does he want Henry? Henry is the truest believer, but why would Pan need him? Pan already believes in all of this.

Let me know what you think in the comments. Until the next episode, goodbye dearies.

xoxo, Shelbs <3